OK – we’re not really big on product reviews, but protein bars are something I feel pretty strongly about.
That’s because most of them are actively criminal – being full of trans fats, sugar, polyols, and incomplete proteins (hydrolysed collagen). You’d literally be better off eating a Snickers.
That’s why when Reggie from Predator Nutrition sent me one of these as a sample, I wasn’t particularly enthused.
Until I read the label.
Hang on… why aren’t my arteries-clogging from reading this?
Turns out the makers of these bars felt the same way as I do about the abomination that is the protein-bar market and decided to do something about it.
The protein content is completely from legit protein sources (whey), they’re low carb with no artificial sweeteners (lo han guo), and the isomalto-oligosaccharides are a source prebiotic fibre that will produce significant poo PBs with around 18 GRAMS of fibre per bar. When you put these in the microwave for 10 seconds, they come to life and adopt a gorgeous gooey-cakey texture.
Promising stuff. I therefore took on the arduous task of reviewing each flavour for you (the things I do for the cause…). Results below.
Nice cake consistency when in microwave, tastes a little sickly but much like the buttery biscuit base of a strawberry cheesecake.. Not the plastic strawberry flavour that cheap protein powders use.
Berry – 5.5/10
Like a sweet berry flapjack. A bit too sweet for me.
Vanilla Almond – 6/10
Not a strong flavor, but not overly sweet/nutty. Good texture, chewy but not arduous. If you’re the boring type that only uses vanilla whey, then this is a good neutral flavour that you won’t get sick of.
Also very chewy. Again, tastes more like an actual coconut than the artificial flavourings. Not overly sweet. If you love coconut, then it’s a no brainer.
Lemon Cream Pie: 6.5/10.
Softer texture, like a pie. Authentic lemony flavour, mildly zesty.
Peanut butter and Jelly – 6.5/10
Nice, but like a cross between berry and peanut. Heated is nicer, but I prefer pure peanut. .
Chocolate Peanut – 7/10
Nice, a little salty. The most chewy flavour, and significantly more peanutty than chocolatey.
Banana Nut: 8/10
GENUINELY tastes of banana bread. Softer texture when microwaved.
Rich, bready texture, not too sweet but strong, natural-tasting banana flavour.
Cookie dough – 8/10
This was good – very authentic. Good texture and v sweet with ample bits of chocolate in it
Strong nutty cinnamon with almond. Tastes like a Danish cinnamon whirl. soft texture, which feels like you’re eating the dough of a cinnamon whirl, and very filling.
Makes you feel guilty eating it because it should be naughty. This is the most satiating of all the flavours.
Apple pie gets a 9/10:
Perfect taste, sweetness and texture when cold.
Nice chewy bits of apple in it.
Microwave: fooled me. Genuinely can imagine eating this with some cream on top. Better than most REAL apple pies I’ve encountered.
Chocolate Brownie: 10/10
This just IS a chocolate brownie.
A hint of salt reminiscent of gourmet, malty dark chocolate. Very low carb (4g per bar).
Microwaved – OMGZ SOFT BROWNIES FRESH FROM THE OVEN. Bought a box of this flavour immediately after trying the sample, still my favourite flavour, closely followed by the Apple Cinnamon.
Chocolate mint: 7/10
Delivers as promised, not offensive or too artificial tasting, and a good helping of chunks. Worth a place in the cupboard.
Raspberry white chocolate 6/10
One of these is great. But a box got way too sweet for me. I’m maybe unusual here, these are often a common favourite because of the big chocolate chunks.
Cookies and cream 9/10
Basically Oreo flavour. Instant classic and usually rotate these with apple pie, cinnamon and brownie.
Not sure what happened here. On the first bite of the first smore’s marshmallowy flavoursome marshmallowy goodness, I thought this was the holy grail, and I was ready to give up on all other flavours. After a few more bites they became a bit sickly too. Still a great flavour but use them sparingly.
So keen to try these, can’t get a hold of them. If someone who has access could be a dear and send us one, we’ll love you forever.
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